Becoming Charismatic
Anita Roddick passed away 6 years ago. She was an extremely charismatic lady. She hung on to your every word and you hung on to hers. She had a natural ability to listen, take the gem from the information you were sharing and use it to solve a problem or add to an idea somewhere down the track.
Somewhat surprisingly I have begun the realize that not all charismatic people are born that way; most have earned it and learned it.
Some people light up a room just by walking in. You feel their presence before you realize they have arrived. For other charming people it’s not until you engage with them in conversation that you find out how special they are.
These special people are the ones who just instantly make you feel important and special. This can be you.
Charismatic people are good entrepreneurs because they are able to build and maintain great relationships, positively influence people around them, and make people feel better about themselves. They become the people you want to do business with.
Charisma isn’t about our level of success, our presentation skills or the image we project – it’s more about how we engage with others.
There are many characteristics of charismatic people but they all begin, as my yoga teacher muses, by being “present in the moment. There is no past, there is no future, you are here now.”
I have spent time with lots of charismatic people from Anita Roddick to Australia’s own Kamahl. Here’s what I’ve noticed about them and what you can do to replicate them.
1. They listen more than they talk.
Ask questions. Maintain eye contact. Smile. Frown. Nod. Respond–not so much verbally, but nonverbally.
That’s all it takes to show the other person they’re important.
2. They focus on you
Don’t check your phone. Don’t glance at your monitor. Don’t focus on anything else, even for a moment.
3. They give without expecting to receive
Never think about what you can get. Focus on what you can provide. Giving is the only way to establish a real connection and relationship.
4. They shine the spotlight on others.
No one receives enough praise. No one. Tell people what they did well.
5. They choose their words.
The words you use impact the attitude of others.
We all want to associate with happy, enthusiastic, fulfilled people. The words you choose can help other people feel better about themselves and make you feel better about yourself, too.
6. They don’t gossip
Don’t laugh at other people. When you do, the people around you wonder if you sometimes laugh at them.
7. They readily admit their failings.
Be humble. Share your screwups. Admit your mistakes. Be the cautionary tale. And laugh at yourself.
People won’t laugh at you. People will laugh with you and they’ll want to be around you a lot more.
